As quoted by Randall Parker, here is Gregory Cochran’s novel perspective on the  Iraq War:

If the President had decided (because of a stroke with truly
interesting side effects) that we could no longer stand idly by in the
eternal conflict between penguins and skuas
(penguins = Good, skuas = Evil) and sent an expedtionary force to
Antarctica, an expedition in which a thousand soldiers froze to death
and ten thousand others lost limbs to frostbite – an expedition that
cost one hundred billion dollars, a conflict in which the skuas and
blizzards left the issue in doubt, one in which we discovered that
penguins are thoroughly unlikeable when you get to know them better –
if he had done this instead of invading Iraq the country would be
substantially better off than it is today.

I know, we don’t want to give them any ideas.